Saturday, November 22, 2014

When Empathy is Not Enough

"My eyes fail because of tears,
My Spirit is greatly troubled;
My heart is poured out on the earth
Because of the destruction of the daughter of my people."
Lam 2:11

Lamentations is a book of suffering. The wails of a people in suffering from their sin, begging for God to relent His anger, and hear their cries for help. When I was reading this, what I found most interesting was the author- Jeremiah. Jeremiah was an upright man who listened to God, but as a prophet He was sharing in Israel's pain and suffering.  He was lamenting and crying out to God because He literally could feel the pain that was present with those whom God called him to prophesy to. Being a prophet (or a prophetess) is a very relational thing. Its not just speaking what God has revealed, but often times is feeling those things with others as well and walking through the pain and challenges with them.

This gift is one that goes far past being sympathetic and even empathetic. Empathy, although it is a way of identifying with someone, often times can be accomplished on your own. I could research the culture, history and issue of human trafficking here in Cambodia and have some understanding of what goes on here and the pain that people go through. And I have done that, and it has given me some perspective and empathy towards the people that I have begun to build relationships with here. It's not enough though, and it doesn't reach deep enough to walk through healing with them.


Although there is no word in the dictionary for this, the partnership with God in feeling others suffering is one that Jeremiah knew well. It is something that I am beginning to know well, too. It goes way past empathy when you identify with the trafficked and abused and God allows you to feel the deep places of hurt with them- and lets you in on the partnership to combat it. Lately, I often feel like the pain has been in my life too because of the weight of feeling others suffering.  I can sometimes feel the anxiety, the heart gripping fear, the feelings of hopelessness, and like your stuck in a deep dark pit. A pit that leaves you feeling shamed, dirty, used, and no longer in control of you own body even at a very young age. Honestly, it's overwhelming but it is necessary for me to feel these things with God so that I can intercede and help combat those feelings and situations with the trafficked and abused here. Like Jeremiah, my heart cries to God have been the same heart cries of those who I'm ministering to. I don't think I would know the depth of prayers that needed to come off of my lips to God, if I wasn't feeling what they are feeling though. So in the moments where I'm overwhelmed I really am grateful God is letting me carry this with them.

A couple weeks ago, I was sitting in my office trying to work and all of a sudden I felt an overwhelming  feeling of anxiety and restlessness. I felt this huge burden on my chest, like something gripping on to me that wouldn't let go. I went to the roof of the school, and I started to pray and worship God. I recognized this feeling as not something from me and I turned my prayers into intercession. Someone was in a reality of what I was feeling. Later on I found out that it was one of my kindergartners stuck in a place of abuse. I was working through her abuse case file, and couldn't help but feel what this little one was feeling. I could only put my face in my hands and cry with God. It was the first time feeling like God's partner in fighting this issue of child trafficking here. I felt God's burden with this child, sat with her in the turmoil, and grieved it with Father God.


Its a beautifully hard place to be. Everyday here in Cambodia, consists of some difficult situation and I'm learning more and more how to be God's partner in that. It is nothing that I can do on my own, my own strength would have failed me months ago. I'm learning though, how to be content in God when life is consistently hard. It's not an up and down lifestyle like I lived in America, but its a valley lifestyle with dry bones everywhere. However, I am choosing daily to call the dry bones to life instead of wallow in how things look hopeless around me.  

It has been really beautiful getting to see a part of God's heart that I have never encountered before simply through suffering with others. There has been many moments where I have just wanted to scream to God to intervene in abusive situations and do something, but then I realize that He is doing something- and its through me. God could step in in a second and save the little girl being sold by her family to a foreigner for sex, but he chooses to be a relational God, and use me(who without Him wouldn't even have the capability to do anything) to actually do something about it. It all boils down to love. He loves the little girl who has been trafficked and is sitting in one of my classrooms, and He loves me enough to let me partner with Him to help her heal from it.

God is moving in this place. Girls are getting rescued and redemption is thick in the air here. I am just so grateful that God has chosen me to be a mouthpiece of freedom here, even in the tough day to day moments. I am currently in need of new partners($300/month more)  so that I can continue partnering with God here. If you would like to be a part of that you can hit the partner with me tab above. Thank you for listening, and for being a part of this beautiful journey with me. 

Followers